Friday, June 05, 2015

Two weeks on Facebook...what does it all mean?





So, I gingerly stuck a toe into the morass that is Facebook two weeks ago and sent out a few friend requests (coaxed over the phone by my daughter).  So what have I learnt in the last fortnight about this creature and was my initial scepticism of it well founded? Well, I have discovered-
  • That people seem to be able to locate you and friend request you even if you didn't contact them.  This was a surprise.  Why on earth would anyone want to connect with me, if I haven't invited them?
  • That in amongst the welcoming messages were several dire warnings about it.  
  • That, unlike a blog, you cannot control the content on your page (I knew this). 
  • That it operates in the world of real names (see below) and it is sometimes difficult to work out who someone is when I only know their blogger name (as I found out at the Salute bloggers meet).
  • That you quickly discover far more about people's lives than you ought to, or want to, know.
  • That there are Facebook pages for a number of wargames companies I support, with up to date information on what they are up to.  This is the biggest discovery, I think.  I had always assumed that company websites would have the latest news but this is not so.  
  • That there are groups of other users which revolve around particular hobby interests.
  • That there is a danger, as with my children, that it takes over your life.
Well, some surprises but mostly what I expected.  I am still not sure if this is going to be an ongoing thing or just an experiment for when I have to launch my work focussed one.

The real issue is one of identity and persona.  Scott pointed out that Facebook (unlike Blogger, for example) doesn't like pseudonyms.  Recently, (and he has done it before) John Treadaway, of the South London Warlords, was urging TMP members to use their real names.  One of the things that surprised me is how many people are prepared to put their real names out there and then hold forth with their views on all sorts of stuff.  I may just be paranoid but this doesn't seem to be a good idea to me. However, your personal experiences shape your views on this, I suppose.

If we look at identity, then one key aspect of my life is that the first name I was given is not used by any of my family and never has been.  My sister, for example, doesn't call me by any of my real names and those of my parents friends who are still about don't either.  Many assume that this name (originally derived from a nickname when I was a baby) is my real name.  When I got married many of the people attending the wedding came up to me afterwards and asked about my name, in genuine surprise.  My wife and children don't use my real name as they know I actually don't like it very much.  So, I have always had a situation where I have my real name for things like school (actually I had a different nickname, again, amongst my friends at school), work and acquaintances and a completely different name for family and family friends.  This created two separate personae for me too.  I think everyone has many different personae (maybe they don't) but it seems that with Facebook, in using your real name, you have to be happy to let your different personae be revealed and the different parts of your life be exposed to all.

This leads to another point about keeping different aspects of your life separate which, again, Facebook militates against.  You can, of course, cant your page so it defines one aspect of your life as I have done with mine and wargaming.  I won't, on the whole Friend request someone whose Facebook page doesn't have wargames content because they they may want to keep that aspect of their life away from their family life, for example.  I also wouldn't post something on someone else's page or share a post, on the whole, either as, again, you are risking treading on other people's personal space, I feel.  Personally, I have a number of different interests but I wouldn't put them all into one place (as critics of my multiple blogs berate me for!).    I also have, for example, different groups of friends who I wouldn't want to meet each other.  Just because I like A and B doesn't mean that A would get on with B.


For some reason I am unable to explain, the word "politics" always conjures up a mental image of potato salad.  


Coincidentally, here was something on the internet, when I was setting up the Facebook page, about what things you should never discuss with work colleagues.  It was common sense, really, but I will never discuss religion or politics, for example, simply because, firstly, I'm not very interested in either and, secondly, they can be very, very divisive.  It's a matter of degree about what you talk about with friends and colleagues, of course, but you always have to assume that anything you say to someone may get repeated to someone else (just like anything you post online).  I am surprised by the number of political comments I have seen from people.  I have recently been helping a firm to recruit some specialist staff.  The Chairman gets his HR department to search candidates social media for an online presence.  If he sees political statements on Facebook which don't match his own politics that person is not going to get recruited.  This is why I don't support the John Treadaway "lets all use our real identities" view.  There are aspects of peoples lives which, if I knew about them, would have a similar effect on me if I was recruiting staff.  I have met people who view any interest in military matters as dubious, for example.  I was speaking to a friend this week (who doesn't have Facebook) and he relentlessly cyber stalks anyone he comes across at work and informed me of how much information you can find out about someone just from knowing their real name (especially if the name is a little bit unusual).




Another thing I have discovered is that posting on Facebook with a link to one of my blogs has demonstrated an immediate effect, as can be seen from this chart looking at my Argonautika blog after a Facebook link.

Overall I quite like Facebook so far.  I like being able to do shorter posts than I would on a blog.  I like access to up to date information from figure manufacturers, I like seeing what other people are painting and gaming and I like some of the military photographs posts I have seen.  What I am not so keen on are political statements, "wittily" captioned pictures, polls and so forth but that, of course, is because people use Facebook for a wider circulation than just wargames contacts.  It's mixing "friends" from different lives, again.  The experiment continues for the time being...

22 comments:

  1. Interesting post. Like you, I find Facebook easier to use to keep track of hobby developments but don't really post a lot of personal stuff - besides who's really interested in what I had for dinner or to know that I'm a sucker for dog videos. I look forward to seeing how your experiment in social media works out.

    Of course, I do reserve the right to organize and execute an intervention if you start asking me to play "Candy Crush" or become one of those chain letter re-posters "Re-Post this if you....."

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  2. I am amazed that your colleague shared that he extracted information from people's online world - I have a friend that does the same, and it always struck me as something dirty to do. I tend to avoid such things, just as I avoid Facebook for the reason that we all know how humans are fixated on the social life and the "secrets" of others or how to get the upper hand in a social situation.

    I am glad that I am - surprisingly yet still - my own man and can still get along with my life without being employed. But when the time comes and my very ascetic lifestyle finally needs fresh greens, then I will be very happy that most of my politcal and religious ramblings are (sort of) under a pseudonyme (alias?) - I have heard the exact same as you mention above: HR-people stalk the net to find personal information that is deemed incompatible with the company.

    As a funny sidenote, and perhaps a testament to the different uppbringing between the blogposter and this commenter: When visiting Iran, a highly Muslim country, we were warned by U.D. not to talk about religion and politics. First subjects with the first guy that mastered French well enough? Israel, religion, politics. It is interesting, but perhaps one need not only cohones but a tad of dumb recklessness to do it... ? Still, I would never be as reckless as to join FB! ;D

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  3. Very pointed comments I didn't want t use my real name in Facebook nor on Google but due to technical ignorance when I set up my blog Google+ started using my real name and then the cat was out of the bag. Previously I had used kidterminal on all the forums I was involved in but thanks to Google by blog readers know my real name more than my wargaming persona.

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    1. Yes, I ended up with a Google+ page just to follow one blog not realising all the information it then distributes. I now won't follow blogs which only have a Google+ option and I won't join "circles" whatever they are....

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  4. Very interesting ! difficult for me to really find the good words to explain my own position about Facebook(because of my poorly english!) but:
    -Like you, I never share other stuff, even if I'm interested in.
    -I've a private life (I've never post a picture of my nice purple-red toilet tissue !) , a public life (scouting, it's not a secret !) and a Hobby life (I've my dedicated page with my beloved pseudo !)
    -I don't know why, but I don't have a lot of request in fact... and I've enough "friends" !
    -Real name ? I can call me Samuel Lessage ( almost "Sam Wise" in french! ), do you think that FB will block my account because it's not my real name ? No ! but my friends in "real life" wouldn't be able to recognize me ! and sometimes it's useful for my "public life" ....
    -Agree with you about the manufacturers (and retailers too) : fresh news, we have, with FB .
    -I don't know what they do with all the informations they collect about me, and at last, I don't care.
    -I agree too about the fact that it's time eater!
    -and I don't like the look of my fb page! not very creative !

    Well ... see you later here (good !) or on FB ( less good)
    Have a nice week-end with your family and real friends!

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    1. I always find your comments perfectly comprehensible!

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    2. Thanks ! I think that some time ago, my english has been a source of misunderstanding, so I take more care to what I write !
      and unfortunately, sometimes, it's difficult for me to understand all the posts ...

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  5. Gave up on Facebook several years after being deluged by dross from (mainly) American "Friends". But on a far more important note - what's the verdict on Black Sails Season 2?

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    1. Well, I think it is improved, mainly because there is much more ship to ship action.

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  6. I like FaceBook, and use it from time to time. But I abhor political postings, no matter from which side.

    This is mainly because most of them accuse the other side of being nasty, stupid, corrupt etc. This means that in effect someone posting such a comment willy-nilly on FaceBook is accusing many of their friends of being nasty, stupid, corrupt etc, because people come from all parts of the political spectrum.

    It's bad enough putting up with political posturing at election time ... but surely people can leave trying to influence each others' politics alone for the rest of time. After all, I'm not going to change my politics just because of what someone has posted saying how nasty, stupid or corrupt I am ... in fact, it is more likely to make me dig in my toes.

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  7. Very good summary on FB, and I agree on it.

    Facebook is a good and bad tool at the same time. Public exposure is not something that people of our age are keen on, but the new generation has been used to real TV and how much people like to talk about their secret/private problems in talk shows. So Facebook is only a reflection of it.
    I agree with you that the more public your small details are, the more you expose yourself to retaliation from people who secretly despise what you like. For that reason alone, I separate my Blog, my Linkedin and my Facebook accounts. No point to have all of them inter-rrelated.
    Some people have linked some of my blog on FB and the result is immediate. Still I prefer keeping both in the different world/life aspect they belong to.

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    1. I hadn't thought about the different generations aspect. Youngsters seem more tolerant than those of my generations so perhaps don't worry about what others think. Tolerance was not a defining characteristic of my family when I was young. I wasn't, for example, allowed to watch ITV (then Britain's only commercial TV station) by my parents as it was "working class". Well, there was an exception for Thunderbirds but that was only because my parents had met Gerry Anderson and thought he was an alright chap!

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  8. Another good read Sir! With regards to using your real identity for things like Facebook or Blogger, I toyed with a pseudonym when setting up my blog, but in the end made the conscious decision to use my real name. I knew from the outset that the style of the blog would be non combative and that I would be able to moderate comments. I also wanted it to be my blog and something that I could say to others, 'this is what I do' when not teaching. Interestingly the pupils found my now deleted Facebook profile within weeks of it going live, but have yet to discover, or more likely are not interested in, Sir's wargames blog. Either way enjoy the experience!

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    1. I don't think youngsters do blogging. It's far too time consuming!

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  9. Very perceptive comments, LH. I only really joined Facebook because my wife was on it and it seemed the best way of keeping touch with people in Australasia. I learned quickly not to post political stuff, as many of my Facebook "friends" have different political leanings, and of course one's employer or prospective employer can see what you've written. I only recently came out as a wargamer to my Facebook community, although most of them knew anyway. Don't forget that people see what you've "liked", as I learnt when I liked a certain political party and was instantly picked up on it...

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    1. Thanks for the tip about what you "like". Maybe I better not "like" Kelly Brook's page after all.

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  10. That Chairman sounds like a right twat. Only recruiting people who think like you is a great way of having an incompetent organisation unable to face change. Is he really that insecure?

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    1. True but there are more people out there like that than some imagine. Oddly, he is very liberal when it comes to race, gender (I've worked at a firm in the City where the boss absolutely wouldn't recruit women unless they were fifty or over), age and sexual alignment but on politics, no.

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  11. Facebook is both hero and villain at the same time. I keep my Facebook profile separate from work and do not connect with anyone remotely involved with my work or work place. At the same time I try and button down privacy and do not allow anyone to read all my posts. I like Facebook for the ability to stay in touch but hate it for the endless friend requests from people I don't know and companies that would like to sell me stuff I don't want/need

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  12. I love your blog sir it makes fine reading and offers insperation for my hobbies, a site which i found and am i content to browse to my hearts content, regarding facebook its monitored by the FBI and the CIA as well as others you mentioned, i had been a member of FB for years, but now i am no longer a member (for a month now) and i am so very glad it is not in my life any more, i may miss one or two areas but if i look hard enough i can find links to them elsewhere, imo you dont need FB

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